Wow so the last few months have been a roller coaster to say the least… high as a kite some days, then others I feel like I have never felt lonelier in my life. Being a single mother is hard. In fact not even just being a single mother, just a mother in general is hard, anyone who says its easy is either lying or drinks a bottle of wine a night, to numb the pain. The sleepless nights are catching up on me, my back is screwed from lifting a fourteen pound baby all day, my tummy still wobbles and my boobs have started to resemble cocker spaniel ears! Not a good look for a 27 year old! But aside from the few negatives the positives are just wonderful. Jasper giggles, blows bubbles and has ever started to roll over! I’m in heaven when I’m with him, but when he goes to bed at night, it’s hard.
I have friends who have babies, who have been amazing, but having recently spent time with an old friend who is in a similar position to myself, I must say it’s the best days I have. Although spending time with other mothers does help, hearing about their husbands and boyfriends, kills me! I have nothing to contribute to the conversations and makes me feel more isolated than ever, Almost like the time when I took my birthing partner to the antenatal classes, and the teacher thought we were lesbians! No word of a lie! So spending time with some one who doesn’t judge and actually does know what I’m going through is a blessing.
And lastly this week, I’ve finished my APP www.bumpandme.co.uk Becoming single when nine weeks pregnant was not ideal, but when I felt like I couldn’t cope and my family and friends just didn’t understand what I was feeling, I turned to the internet. From downloading apps to searching through forums, I found nothing I could relate to. Apps mentioned your husband or partner far to often, and when your feeling hormonal and emotional with no one to cuddle the last thing I want to read is get your partner to give you a massage or run you a bath. I wanted to launch myself. Forums and websites about single mums-to-be had a stereotype that just wasn’t me, and I felt I couldn’t relate. To which I had a light bulb moment, I do not want other women feeling like how I felt, even if i only make one other woman feel like their not alone, my job is done. So to which little savings I had, I created an APP just for mums-to-be, not a partner, not a husband in sight or mentioned. I hope you have as much fun reading it, as I did creating it. 🙂
Lots of Love